‘Your Dad’s a legend’ and ‘your old man’s a top bloke’ – words I used to hear often yet shrug off, because there’s simply no way my Dad is cool…
Then last week I went on a ski trip with a good friend and her Dad. Here I was skiing in Bulgaria with my mates Dad and his pals, having a bloody good time. In fact, I loved it so much, I’ll happily join them again next year. This surprise sparked two revelations. First, if I thought my mates Dad was a legend, then maybe, just maybe what others were saying about my Dad could also be true. And second, maybe I’m getting on a bit.
The Father Daughter Relationship
Like most little girls I spent my younger years idolising my Daddy. Only to dump him in my teenage years and early twenties either being embarrassed by him, pissed off at him or draining him of cash.
But as I turned 30 something changed. Maybe it was living so far away, for so long and seeing him noticeably age. Or maybe it was having more responsibility in my own life. But for one, I stopped expecting things from him, then I began to feel grateful for all he had done for me. These two things finally allowed me to see my old man objectively. To see him for who he is as a person, rather than as someone who is required by unwritten biological laws, to provide for me and love me unconditionally.
Getting older, but not growing up
The second thought that came to me skiing, dare I say it, was that I’m getting on a bit myself. This revelation reminded me of the words my Dad often quotes. Growing old does not mean you have to grow up. A realisation that brings me comfort. After all it explains why as we get older, our friends vary much more in age than when we were younger. And why we develop a tendency to seek out people who are mentally and attitudinally in the same place as us.
Luckily, getting on a bit has meant I’m now able to see my Dad as everyone else sees him, as a top bloke. Sure he still tells Dad jokes that he thinks are hilarious, can be stubborn and doesn’t take any shit, but I now find these things add to his northern charm.
So when people ask me what’s one of the best things about being back in Donny, I reply that it’s being able to hang out with my Dad. Because as it turns out, my old man is one of my best mates – how lucky is that!!! BDx.
Things I’m Shocked to Find Myself Saying to The Old Man:
- Oh that sounds nice, can I come too?
- Dad here’s that tenner I owe you.
- That’s a nice jumper.
- Thank you.
- Do you want to come skiing with me next year?
- Dad tell that joke again… (only joking Pops, this one will never happen!)